Citations:said no one ever

Interjection: "(Internet slang) used to imply that the preceding statement is absurd or false"

 * 2012, Brett Downer, "(Un)Civil Discourse", Thrive Magazine, October 2012, page 34:
 * --"'Because of your post on Facebook, I am totally changing all of my political ideals!' -- Said no one, ever."
 * 2013, gym advertisement, Nanaimo News Bulletin, Volume 25, Number 6, 14 May 2013, page 7:
 * “Wow, I really regret that workout,” said no one. Ever.
 * 2013, Parker Yamasaki, "Standing Proper", The Reykjavík Grapevine, Issue 9, 5 July 2013 - 18 July 2013, page 44:
 * “Hey, that group of kids look pretty fly on those Segways,” said NO ONE EVER.
 * 2013, "Playlist of the Week", Varsity (Cambridge University), Number 773, 15 November 2013, page 20:
 * "The sun is shining! My essays are done! I have so little work, I'm going to take a weekend off!" said no one ever (or the Land Ec down the corridor).
 * 2013, "Your Man thinks Northwest should scrap, lose all business majors", The Northwest Missourian (Northwest Missouri State University), Volume 89, Number 13, 21 November 2013, page A8:
 * Option B) "You know, I have a degree and I'm qualified to become a dean at a university. You know where I'd like to accept a position? A little school that thinks it's a cutting edge electronic campus. In a tiny mid-western town with a Wal-Mart to provide exciting night-life." Said no one ever.
 * 2014, Cathy Adams, "A Bad Romance", Escapism, Issue 6, page 29:
 * In the halcyon pre-credit-crunch days of 2007, the obvious place to spend the most romantic day of the Gregorian calendar was in Europe's weirdest capital – said no one, ever.
 * 2014, Bed Bath & Beyond advertisement, Eating Well, September/October 2014, page 22:
 * “I have too many coupons,” said no one ever.
 * 2014, "A Review Of Performance Reviews", Inside UM (University of Miami), Volume 1, Fall 2014, page 21:
 * “I can't wait to do my performance review today,” said no one ever.
 * 2014, Philip Bradley, "Equal Rights Could Mean Changes in Your Insurance", Beau Magazine, Winter 2014, page 12:
 * Insurance can be quite exciting to talk or read about...SAID NO ONE EVER!
 * 2015, Elizabeth Lynn Casey, Wedding Duress, Berkley (2015), ISBN 9780698186545, unnumbered page:
 * "As we all know, there's not a single color out there I can't showcase, but that said, I have to agree with you, dear, Smoldering Blaze may well be the best."
 * "Said no one ever," Rose Winters groused from her spot in the center of the group.
 * 2015, "10 Trends We Hope Do Not Follow Us Into 2015", FACES Magazine, January 2015, page 36 (approx.):
 * "Her butt looks so good in those high-waisted shorts" ... said no one ever.
 * 2015, Gabrielle Beran, "The Beginning Of The End Of The Patriarchy", The Beaver (London School of Economics), Issue 825, 27 January 2015, page 10:
 * I'm sorry but "I got a Brazilian wax because it was a pleasant and enjoyable experience" and "I love the searing pain of having my underarm hairs ripped out" said no-one. Ever.
 * 2015, Olivia Siciliano, "Need More Sleep?", The Stratford Oracle (Stratford High School, Houston, Texas), Volume 42, Issue 7, 27 February 2015, page 6:
 * "Man I got way too much sleep last night..."
 * -said no one ever
 * 2015, Jacqui Thorndyke, "Giving & receiving", Vale Life, February/March 2015, page 65:
 * 'Steamers and cubic zirconia are a girl's best friend', said no one ever.
 * 2015, Jordan Tishler, "How To Use Tape as an Effect During The Mixing Process", Performer Magazine, May 2015, page 22:
 * I work in digital all the time, but “digital makes things sound better,” said no one ever.